fitting in or having the life you desire?

In a conversation with a friend one day, when asked how I was as I moving through a problem that came into my life, I replied that I was focusing on solutions. She responded that she would do the same but since everyone else was complaining about everything, she felt she wouldn't fit unless she did the same. I asked her, and I ask you “Which is more important – fitting in or having the life you desire?”

“The definition of Insanity is doing the same things, and expecting different results.”
~ Albert Einstein ~


When you start focusing on your Desires, and you start to have them and accomplish them, you will not longer “fit in” with the people who choose to focus on the problems and the excuses. Only you can decide if you want to fit in with the people who criticize and complain, or fit in with the group of people who are having and accomplishing their deepest Desires. As you write your List of Desires, answering two questions with each one may enlighten you and clarify your commitment: 1) How will I change?
2) How will this change my life?

“It's not so much that we're afraid of change or so in love with the old ways, but it's that place in between that we fear . . . .
It's like being between trapezes.
It's Linus when his blanket is in the dryer.
There's nothing to hold on to.”
~ Marilyn Ferguson~

Be deeply honest with yourself. Will you feel more freedom? Will you feel happier? Will you be more generous? Will you be afraid of what others will think and say? Will you be nice or mean?

Some people stop themselves because they are afraid of actually having what they really Desire.

“The most important thing to remember is this:
To be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become.“
~ W.E.B. Du Bois~

Others are afraid people may not like them.

”When you rise above the masses you will always become a target.
Just as a flower grows taller than the surrounding grass,
and becomes a target for the nourishing sunshine,
it also becomes a target for attempts to be cut down..”
~ (original quote) Sumner Davenport ~

Others are afraid of becoming “like those mean or dishonest people”.

“Success does not change a person,
it only allows them to express who they really are on a larger scale”
~ Victor Frankl ~

By reviewing your reactions to the questions and your honest answers, you will find your fears. However, accompanying those fears will be your solutions. When you make an agreement with yourself how you will grow in a positive way, you will be able to see the obstacles that have been in your way. Some of these obstacles may have been deep in your subconscious and now in the light of your awareness, you can make conscious choices. Only though being deeply honest with yourself will you see what has been stopping you in the past, up until today. In the unconscious these obstacles may be seen as large and overwhelming as a mountain. In the light of your loving acceptance, they can be reduced to the size of a pebble, and you will be able to remove them from your path and continue moving forward.

“The creative is the place where no one else has ever been.
You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition.
What you'll discover will be wonderful.
What you'll discover is yourself”
~ Alan Alda ~

When you write how you will change next to your Desires, you will be reinforcing your positive change every time you read your List.

“First say to yourself what you would be; 
and then do what you have to do.”
~ Epictetus ~

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